Digital Get Down (yes, the title of this post is the name of an ‘NSYNC song)

I have a new obsession: Twitter.

I’ve only had an account for two weeks, but I’m totally hooked.  (Follow me! @dudewheresmyBF.)  I get to post my random thoughts about anything and everything, and 15 other people read them! (Yes, only 15 as of yet.  Have I mentioned that you should follow me?)  I get to read others’ random thoughts about anything and everything!  I can read the random thoughts of my favorite celebrities, too: Rachel Dratch, the contestants from the past few seasons of The Bachelor/Bachelorette, and A.J. McLean from the Backstreet Boys!  I am in love.

I guess I’ve always had an interest in putting my writing out there in online forums.  It began with Xanga when I was in middle school, then MySpace in early high school, later LiveJournal, now WordPress.  This is the first time, though, that I’ve shared intimate details of my personal life—and the personal lives of people I’m involved with—in such a public way.  It feels kind of weird sometimes.

And it also brings up the questions—those many a dating blogger has tackled—of if and how and when to tell those people I’m involved with that I do this.  Luckily—well, unluckily for my dating life, but luckily in terms of this particular conundrum—I haven’t faced this problem with anyone yet.  But still—sometimes I feel kind of bad for writing about people as they remain blissfully unaware.  I keep thinking of that line in the Destiny’s Child song “Survivor” when the narrator (?? do they have that in songs?  I am such an English major) is saying that even though this dude has treated her like shit she’s not going to stoop to his level: “I’m not gonna diss you on the internet—cuz my mama taught me better than that.”  I am trying really hard not to diss anyone on the internet!  I am trying not to reveal identifying details or say anything horribly mean and judgmental. I’m trying to do right by the guys I’m writing about, even if I don’t think they did right by me.

It’s risky business, my friends.  Here’s a cool New York Times article I read the other day that talks all about it (Twitter specifically).  Some couples found the solution to be asking each other for permission before posting anything questionable.  I’m not sure how that would work; and I feel kind of defensive: this is my blog, containing my feelings, so why should I have to operate based on what someone else thinks?  On the other hand, when I finally meet someone I really, really care about, of course I wouldn’t want to do anything that could conceivably offend, embarrass, or hurt them.  But I also worry about the day when I have to tell someone I’m dating that I write this blog. How will that conversation go?  All of the potential bad reactions are kind of scary to think about.

I don’t know what the answer is here.  What do you guys think?


2 thoughts on “Digital Get Down (yes, the title of this post is the name of an ‘NSYNC song)

  1. missjuly729 says:

    As a fellow dating blogger, I had this come up recently where a guy I was planning to go out with “friended” me on Facebook (where I have links to my blog) prior to our date. I warned him about it as I was accepting his request, and he was pretty cool with it. So, I’d say mention it sooner rather than later, especially if you think the date really has potential!

  2. Thanks for the advice and thanks for reading! I’m glad that the guy was accepting!

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